Yes, the drive to Kyloe is boring - and I've been up there three or four times recently to try the sit start to The Yorkshireman. Sometimes it is fun, with nice people who make fantastic company, sometimes it is in absolute solitude, and other times it is with, erm, complete sausages.
I've arrived at the hardest part of working a problem that is at your limit: I can do it, but I can't do it. If this boulder was ten minutes, or even an hour from the comfort of my home then it wouldn't be such an issue. The long one hundred and thirty five minutes slog is a big added pressure. It's also a long time to allow all the negative thoughts enter my head and prepare today's excuse to myself.
Today was very testing. And I failed. I'm at the stage where I am not looking forward to the next attempt. My little finger has a permanent patch of skin missing from using the second hold, which bites so much that I sometimes have to step off from the pain. It's a problem which relies on good core and accurate body positions, which means I can fail on it all afternoon and go home with hands of good skin and juice in the tank. I want to walk away and go to the Bowderstone to pull hard on some nice edges and go home feeling trashed, but I just can't move on until it's done. I've fallen off with my hand on the crimp a few times- which is the last difficult move. Today I actually had my hand past the hold, but still failed to latch it. I knew that conditions were very poor, it was so humid. I knew that I felt shoddy, the beers and late night were a huge mistake. With all this in mind, I still let it make me angry. And I know that the 'angry' session is when things really start to go downhill. From this point on, it will only be a relief to get it done. I wont be happy and I wont enjoy it, which is a really big shame.
This is a different kind of battle now, and it is one that I am all too familiar with.
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